Microfiber Towels

Towels that don't actually absorb liquid...genius.

Lysol Disinfectant WIPE (Singular)

Have you ever reached for a disinfectant wipe and though, "dang, these are too small, I'll get two?" And then you realize, "wait, these are still too small, I need more than two wipes. In fact I need an entire 33 foot long sheet of counter cleaner!"

NO, you have not. But that's what you get with Lysol. If you were expecting individual tear away sheets, FAIL. I believe there was an afterthought of intention applied to designing the mechanism that is supposed to tear the sheets where they are perforated. For the next 80 counter cleaning sessions, I will be hand tearing each and every sheet.

Should have stuck with Clorox.

Nothing "Super" about Superfloss

I've managed to floss religiously for 5 months now and yesterday my dentist noticed and was very pleased. Historically I've been frustrated with flossing because I have permanent retainers that I must thread between in order to do an adequate job. Flossing is already hard enough to do consistently, so adding the whole threading dilemma is one matter to overcome, but when your floss BREAKS, it's adding insult to injury.

WTF is up with floss that breaks? I cannot complete a normal flossing session with a piece of this "Superfloss" without it breaking. It's called Superfloss because they are individually cut pieces of floss roughly 20 inches long with one end that is waxed and stiffened making it easier to thread through retainers and braces. In addition, 5 inches or so are textured for increase traction and tartar-pick-up.

Glide also makes similar floss that doesn't break, but I was told that Glide floss doesn't pick up as much dental debris, so I tried Oral B's Superfloss. Bad idea. Invariably a piece of this Superfloss gets super-stuck in between my teeth when it breaks. The only solution is to get a piece of glide floss and floss it out.

If I have to floss out your floss, there is something seriously wrong with your floss. Superfloss is supposed to be super strong. I think I saw a superman movie with one of his super-hairs supporting 2000 pounds with its tinsel strength. If your floss can F'ing do that, then you can name it "Superfloss". Otherwise, I will stick to Glide.

No Square Root Button

The Windows calculator has one glaring flaw (and many other minor ones). Even in 'scientific mode' it has no square root button. Sure, sure, you say, you can just take the number to the 1/2-power, that is, to the power of .5, but the square root operand is so common the calculator should have one. It's a real irritant for square root to not have its very own button.

Tangent: meanwhile, I discovered that shift-Insert inserts the value of pi into the calculator. Pretty neat accidental find.

Tripping On My Vacuum

How run of the mill vacuums have failed me:

1. Most vacuums suck!...err not very well.


2. Accessories are mounted loosely on the unit and inevitably fall off during use.


3. There are three nozzle attachments, two of which are there to make you think they are useful, one of which is actually useful.


4. Using the hose will likely yank the vacuum enough to fall over once or twice during use.


5. Opening the vacuum bag cover panels are almost as much of a pain in the ass as putting them back on.

Fail Box Cutters

Jiggly, janky, just-about-cut-myself mount quality is how the blades are attached to the cheap plastic. The plastic doesn't hold the blade firm enough at times. Ever set the blade length to an inch only to see 5 inches slide out on your first cutting attempt? Or have you ever broken the locking mechanism forcing you to hold what's left of the plastic mount with your thumb? BOXTACULAR!

If I squeezed hard enough I think I could crush the plastic with my hand.

Quartet magnetic kitchen dry erase board

My wife bought this dry erase board made by Quartet to be able to write quick messages or lists in the kitchen. Zillions of people have these, but here's what is problematic:

Pulling the marker from its holder takes about the same amount of torque to pull the board off of the refrigerator, because the board's magnets are so flimsy. Every time it falls (4 out of 5 times I've used it), it is aggravating and wastes time (why make it?). Also, the brand label was adhered to the board itself with adhesive that is very difficult to clean off, so upon first use, the residual adhesive made some of the black ink stick to it, leaving ungainly spots.